Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Eternal Earthboung Pets - Ensuring Fluffy gets fed after the Rapture

Followers of my little corner of teh intertubes have probably figured out I'm not much of a religious man. I'm an agnostic at best, a rabid atheist at worst. Fact is I really don't see much reason out there to support the view of a personal, all loving God. I mean if he really paid much attention, then there shouldn't be people born with no arms out there. Yeah you can eat with your feet but that's not the point. However I live in a religious country in a highly religious world, and one thing I've found to be a great source of comedy is the actions of religious people.

I present to you, Eternal-Earth Bound Pets. From the home page:

You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus.

Oh man, oh man. I hope this is a joke. From the Terms and conditions:

Should a relative residing within the rescue location not be Raptured and opts to retain the pet(s), EE-BP will not take posession of the pet(s). No refund will be tendered.

Not much else to say about this, except I'm thinking of starting my own petcare-rapture business and competing with these guys.


  1. What a great scam!

    Personally, I can't wait for the Rapture to come. What's taking God so long? Lord, please hurry up and take your dang churchies up to Heaven. They get on my nerves! Plus, I need a new car.

  2. Yeah I know, we've only been waiting two thousand years, let's hurry it up a little. Those ice caps aren't going to re-freeze themselves.